Saturday 28 July 2012

Saudade

In my Mind's eye I still see you
Your head thrown back
A huge belly fueled laugh
Tumbling from your mouth
But my physical eyes capture the reality
You are gone
I'm left with saudade
Lost, and yearning for one last chance to chat, to giggle, to weep together
Your physical self is now dust
Taken on winds to far away places
Scattered in corners unreachable.
You've been gone a year now,
And still it does not make sense
The why's continue, as does the pain,
But gone you are
Life around continues a little bruised
And we learn, some wounds never heal,
You just get used to the pain
'tenho saudades tuas

Thursday 12 July 2012

Truth and Love

I watch myself twist and twirl
Spinning downwards
I cannot stop
I cannot save myself
The thin skin given to me at birth
Has not toughened with age
Scars have not leathered my wounds
Instead I am more vulnerable than ever

Nerves heightened as lies lash reality
It hurts.......I hurt
Truth is irrelevant. I limp away, broken.
I am defeated, I lost and have to face it.
My fears and suspicions are realised
Manipulators lord their victory
Bridges are burnt
We, I, stand alone - isolated.

And yet,

Still my heart beats, still my brain thinks.
Still my being loves, and is loved.
I am broken but not gone
All my pieces are within reach
Love and truth will adhere them bit by bit
Because Truth is not irrelevant to me
It matters, I matter, We matter